I woke up this morning with I hate myself feeling
It's like God shit irony all over that family
All i learned in high school was how to sell drugs
smoking a bowl while I'm peeing. i love having a big dick.
Escorted a stripper to her car last night,and all I got was a "Thanks" and "Go Steelers."
I'm just high and in my robe and I would suck a dick for some pizza rolls. I can't talk about your problems right now
I'm kinda amazed by how many times I've texted the word penis today.
Remind me to tell you how I've been deaf since Sunday at 1245
Come help me clean and have sexual intercourse with me
Bring breadsticks
And I woke up by myself with peanut butter.. Cool
Honestly my life is shambles over a married man who looked like a fuckin NERD ON HIS WEDDING DAY
And don't worry, I have a great track record of rallying after a casual midday blackout.
Yeah that was post sex. I was thinking in my mind, no wonder he didnt ask me to call him daddy since he actually is a dad
What’s the best way to find out if he’s into anal?
I think you have the wrong number, but good luck with that
Baby Shark came on during sex.
She has BABY SHARK on her sex playlist. Who does that?
Randomize
