Is there a "Plan B" app for my iphone?
i popped this huge zit on her back while she was blowing me. it was like a disgusting metaphor for what happened 30 seconds later.
It was the first time I had seen his penis when it wasnt hard. It just looked so vulnerable and a little bit depressed.
My uncles bleeding, my brother has a black eye and my moms topless in the pool... How was your family cookout?
To justify your stumbling you just kept yelling 'it's the boat, not the drinks' We hadn't even left the dock yet....
I asked you if you were ok and you said "dude I'm fine, I'm in the recovery position"
Hooked up with an Aussie chick last night only an Indonesian chick away from completing my lap around the pacific rim
by the time the kitchen caught on fire everyone was too drunk to be alarmed. the host just poured beer on it to put it out. how was yours?
I feel that the drunker I get, the drunker Facebook gets.
Bitch, it's 2 in the afternoon.
Three Architectural classes: $990.00 Architectural supplies: $300.00 Changing majors and using my architectural supplies to roll blunts: Priceless
Omg no. We ate a raw pumpkin last nighr. We dipped it in BBQ sauce.
just shotgunning some tallboys in the cooler, you?
HOW DO YOU GET RAISES EVERY TWO WEEKS?!
And then the night went full on bisexual.
He described his sex dream about me using only emojis
I'm no longer puke free since 2013 am I.
Randomize
