whjeg hajt iyt
say what?
wanna hang out?
i felt like we were having sex on ultimate fighter, and people on the outside kept yelling ELBOW ELBOW! KNEES KNEES!
drug dealer added me on facebook, win ?
omg no way im finding him!
he has no pics of his face, and im always drunk so i cant remember if hes cute or not, but he told me im in his phone as "party girl" which is fitting i guess cause im dragging my hungover ass to buy preggo tests, and i had to get the cheap ones cause i blew all my cash on coke.
you know you were way too high when you wake up next to a handwritten list of all the things you'd do for a Klondike bar
If a "boob" guy and an "ass" guy are discussing which you are better qualified for....just let them
The polaroid of me taking a test-tube of Jegar out of the gay guys mouth pretty much explains my trip to Spain.
we've decided whoever is stupid enough to use the condom that's tacked to the wall deserves to get pregnant.
we're going to the olympic park to run the 100m yeaaaahhh
it's 3am. Nothing could possibly go wrong here.
We have bigger issues at hand... Does anybody know someone in the kalamazoo area that is missing a pair of stilts ?
I would like to formally reclaim my title of a turn up queen.
Also send boobie pics with bobs burgers in background its the only way to get me off anymore
i'm 99% sure they had an orgy while i was passed out
We're not ready for visitors right now.
wtf? who's we?
The Royal We: Me, My Vag, and I.
Remember when we thought adulthood would be different than college?
It is different. We had hopes and dreams back then. Now we're just alcoholics.
I'm not gonna lie, but for some reason I have this strong desire to watch porn with my pint of haagen das.
Randomize
