i felt like we were having sex on ultimate fighter, and people on the outside kept yelling ELBOW ELBOW! KNEES KNEES!
Well I'm 85-90% sure that he licked syrup off my body, but no guarantees...
Does it count if I'm only ambidextrous while masturbating?
I knocked myself out momentarily last night when I fell and hit my head off of my jewelry box while trying to take his pants off... while he was passed out.
Ong my arms are moving wo my consent
Why the hell did you smack that girls beer out of her hand at the end of the night then buy her a double jack and coke for?
Its called bad cop laid cop.
If court goes my way we are flying to Vegas.
I wish I could just hang out in ERs.
So help my penis see only you. Give him some attention as well.
considering I just took 3 shots of fireball I don't think I'm coming back tonight. also the hulk just walked in crushing beer cans on his forehead
Please can we have sex in this office for old times sake
well my apartment and my life are still a disaster but I did clean off my desk so that's gotta count for something...
How don't you remember..? You were getting handfuls of skittles out from our bra screaming TASTE THE RAINBOW.
The best part about theater chicks is nothing is too cliche or out of line. I just fucked her Braveheart style in my entry way while saying goodbye.
outside on the street drinkin, walked into a random house and asked to pee, some kid hands me a beer and says i have to chug it first
Randomize
