Me= Watching Ferngully. My neighbor= Having really loud sex including multiple orgasms
Oh God
I know, but the worst part is I'm not really sure which I'd rather be doing. Feel free to re-evaluate our friendship
He came on my face and told me I looked like a gingerbread house.
She asked me why there was $2 in the lunchmeat drawer of the fridge and BBQ sauce all over the kitchen... I'm not sure but I know it has something to do with you
At the bar dressed as a taco. not a typo. Come down.
I would like to add..this is the first november for two years that i haven't cheated on a bf...thank you..thank you
listening to the two girls in the next stall finish a 40 and laugh at this guy they both fucked. they're calling him 'tulip dick'.
she had that "i just got used" look on her face when i kicked her out at 5am
I never want to hear the words 'my therapist says . . . ' while naked again.
Sorry girl, my dick is like a rollercoaster. You only get a picture after you ride
Last thing I remember is beer bonging sangria. Dear God.
pretty sure tht was the guy who once went to the club dressed as waldo. he still looks weirdly fuckable.
I snuck out three pillows from the hotel i was rolling so hard. They are like little clouds. I regret nothing.
you bet i'm gonna rock his four-foot-two world.
I'm still drunk dear. I just woke up 3 feet from the front door with 20 dollars worth of taco bell in my hands.
i woke up on the third floor, naked in a closet.
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