There is a man walking 2 goats through the city.
Bonus: only one of them was on a leash.
they bought blue cups instead of red...wtf how am i supposed to pretend im on laguna beach??
His shopping cart was nothing but malt liquor and zucchini.
Im shirtless eating a burrito. How urgent is this?
I'm telling you the guy came in bought a box of condoms and all three of the chicks that came in behind him followed him to his car. I want his life
What happened to him?
He was walking right behind us then disappeared.. turns out he checked his luggage at a night club, continued to drink and dance, then slept on the 4th floor of some museum
You coming bye my yot got egg sweet carilne vodklaa
Okay good. And who the fuck put a condom on my foot. That shit hurt
We still need to grow old, buy a house, and drink 40's while wearing old people sunglasses, staring at the young studs mowing our lawn.
It would just be icing on the fucked up cake we're baking, if he got me pregnant.
If you two are having sex, stop. I have something really important to ask you about psychics.
I was going to learn how to knit but I got high instead.
Mike Pence got the fuck boy eyes though
please tell me you're the one making all the weird noise in the yard..
Ya know what's the worst? Being drunk and wanting to show someone a picture of your goddaughter but not wanting to open the pictures on your phone because the first one is of someone's dick..
Randomize