Is it wrong to beat off to a girl to determine if you like her or not?
You kept calling me your small dog last night.
They're making scrambled eggs at 2 in the morning... with rum
I'm trying to decide if I want to bring home my 'beer champion' trophy or my chem books.
I can't look at him without thinking about his cum face
And there might be a gallon of sangria without the lid on the floor in your room. Just be careful when you open the door.
The molly dropped while I was taking a shit. Do you have any idea how scary that is?
That does not seem like timing
You asked me if I was judging you for being drunk, and if I can hypnotize you make sober.
Best day ever, my junk is bigger than Kate Uptons boyfriends. Yay for Fappening day!
As much as my throat was opened up this weekend, you'd think I wouldn't nearly choke on a damn almond.
How bad was it?
Stopped drinking Sunday, hungover on Tuesday bad.
then this guy just runs in screaming, "cant you see my daughter pissed herself???!!!" and that was the start of my 2016.
You start to question your morals when you wake up at 430 and there's three people naked...that you don't no
twas supposed to be night one of rebound break but it was night one of get sloppy drunk and dance half naked in an ice shack
You spent twenty minutes waxing poetic about her ass and her thighs
Randomize
