Dude, I'm so high in the forest and I think I'm in a bear den.
she was a 2....and a legitimate 2. like, helen keller is a 1, this girl...2.
we just did breakfast shots, I have a black eye and savage garden is on . Best weekend ever
Just saw a drunk guy marching down the strip with a garden rake. I feel compelled to follw him
I went out in the middle of the night to smoke my weed.. Didn't realize my dad was sitting on the patio doing the exact same thing..
i'm trying to figure out what goes best with beef ramen. a 2007 merlot or a 2008 pinot noir? i'm leaning toward the pinot noir.
Does anyone know who that girl who fell backwards and broke the shoe rack with her head was?
she gave me head while i watched the '98 Rose Bowl on espn classic. Ryan Leaf really was a huge bust
We finally have the house to ourselves and your out playing Lance Fucking Armstrong
Dude it's bad when your 10 year old son makes fun of your penis size.
This is America. Thomas Jefferson would have said I want some vagina.
My g-ma saw your dick-pic and wants you to know I've got a keeper. She says her big whopper died in Korea. Good thing g-pa is still asleep.
I woke up in a chipotle parking lot with an industrial sized box of condoms and a bag of dounut holes. I need Jesus
Before getting out of the car, she said "Thanks for getting me off." I like how polite she is.
If this adventure is going to get us arrested it'll have to wait until Wednesday so that I can bail myself out.
Randomize
