You can't have hate sex in a hallway!!
She was walking with the authority that 2 beers gave to a light weight.
gettin pulled by a cop with a camera crew. gonna flee. want my 15 min of fame on cops.
Im a photoshop master, i successfully reduced the size of the pupils of all the girls I made out last night with to prove they were not that drunk. So glad the camera goes home with me.
im going to live freely with my legs opened and my heart closed
I was in holding with a guy that got a DUI on a hover round. He was so nice. We're hanging out tonight.
Putting the night light in my bathroom cabinet was the best idea ever. Awesome for puking while light sensitive
I think you can do her, she seemed pretty set for revenge the second time her boyfrind high fives her in the face.
no, forget the keg and come see this. prego pants here is dunking chicken nuggets into pudding and crying over a cat show on animal planet.
at least you know where his tattoos end, so it wasn't a complete waste of time.
my roommate just showed me the scar on her forehead... that she got from a shake weight... That. just. happened.
This is where you say "Why yes we will drink with reckless abandon and hopefully not be in a church parking lot again."
Finding that toy duck there was weird right?
Ugh it's 2016, why can't our bodies just shed fat on their own
Blow Jobs and the Patriots Playing I think I’m going to marry her
Mandatory face masks - finally, a solution for lip augmentation failures and bad breath.
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