Yeah, I tried playing the "see how long he can stay inside of me" game.. And I lost.
I think they should rename 16 and pregnant to "I was fucked in highschool and all I got was a baby and humiliated infront of the nation on MTV"
I just put on my hot pinky lace thong... you know what that means! ;)
Oh god. Slutty you is on the run. Someone needs to alert the city.
you should buy a sheep. A) you get an awesome pet. B) free coat
dude totally just got the jungle juice out of my white top. i am really ready to be a trophy wife.
I just introduced him to multiple male orgasms. I love wine AND tequila
I'm the only kid serving jury duty. And I'm the only one who may walk out of here in handcuffs for a warrant. I'm enabling these people to doubt America's youth once again.
I swear 95% of pictures on my phone are from drunken nights I don't remember with me doing a peace sign alone in somebody's bedroom.
'lets look at pictures of your friend's new baby' was probably the worst post-sex idea we've ever had
It's been this way for a few days. I had chick fil a on Friday so this could be an attack from the Gay Gods as punishment.
Just make it a game! Like 20 questions STD style.
Turns out Edward 40 hands and life-sized jenga is really hard...Didn't stop you from trying. How is your concussion?
so i fell out of a tree on the ave last night. someone told me there was alcohol at the top. bastards.
i just woke up on the desk in his dorm with him snoring in my vagina. better than last week waking up to a different guy puking on my bare ass i guess.
Tell me you're alive little brother. And please tell me you didn't get arrested. You made no fucking sense last night in your random texts and pictures you were sending me.
Randomize
