He lets me throw up in him even if i do it mistakeily- erica talking about the toilet
Spotted at kelly concert- 10 year old in a homemade "I do not hook up" t shirt. Well I should certainly hope not, sweetheart.
This is a mass text. Does anyone know what the hell the asian woman at the end of Napoleon Dynamite is doing in the movie
I went with the blow up doll and I'm glad I did.
i wish every aspect of life was like a bar. flirt with the cute guy two feet across from you and get whatever you want for free
Forgot that I saved my paper as "Eat Shit Edwards" and e-mailed it because I missed class. I'm sure Prof. Edwards will be delighted when she gets it. I don't anticipate a passing grade.
I think misery doesn't even think of me as company anymore. I'm an unofficial roommate.
Phone sex soon? I mean date. Sex date. Date phone.
all 3? possibly?
I think I'm up to the challenge.
You got into a heated argument about Frankenstein's intelligence while double fisting burritos from taco bell.
He made me keep his swollen nut cold with frozen bags of peas while rubbing his tummy because he said I had no choice.
If you hear a sad honk in the wind it is me.
I've got enough liquor to do one of two things on Friday: 1.) Drink myself into a coma or 2.) lay in bed a drunk and cry lonely mess. Happy Valentines Day.
Well, he hasn't actually seen me naked. Just my boobs... and the left side of my vagina.
Just Peed in a cup for my country. Fighting the good fight.
Did I see you at the bar last night?
Yes. You just kept grabbing my boobs and saying how much better they are than yours...
Randomize