Ugh, here's a dating tip. Hairy legs are a major turn off
Does your throat ever get sore from being choked too hard or do u think I'm just getting sick??
They really brought out their best strippers for vday weekend
I rarely go in there. Unless it's for mini cadbury eggs and whiskey.
I'm pretty sure getting a blow job behind a bar in Rome while her little sister is throwing up in a dumpster not 5 feet away, gives entirely new meaning to the phrase "When in Rome"
He made me leave when I challenged "all you bitches" to a game of strip taboo.
i figured out i could get from the downstairs bar to the upstairs bar AND grab pizza by going through the kitchen. it was the greatest discovery of my life besides the flabongo.
Do you think drinking vodka, rum and sourpuss out of a water bottle, in a class that isn't even mine rude?
If I take diet pills with my edibles I'll be a perfect person
I feel like as your wife, as cool with your decision-making skills as I usually am, there should be a bigger explanation to you adopting a child while I'm in Houston.
Seriously, even though I keep it clean, I could douse it in bleach and set it on fire and still not be comfortable with you actually holding it. It's been in my VAGINA.
We just took an Eskimo family picture.. It's pretty cute honestly
We just saw two bitche in pink capris jazzercising down the road. On Thanksgiving.
She was screaming and crying about how she couldn't find her middle finger. Then, she threw her body on to the pavement. Thats the last time we buy a freshmen a handle.
I need to find a divorced guy with a boat and let my tits do the talking
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