I got wasted for the 1st time and I sat in a fridge for 2 hours and a trash can?
Ok...drunk girls at the bar are charging $1 for motorboating. It's fucking WEDNESDAY. I never want to leave.
And for the fourth year in a row Christmas has ended in tears, yelling and me drinking. This is officially our longest running Christmas tradition.
Second night back. Go to house party and played ring of fire. Me plus five other people completely naked. College wins.. It's going to be a long semester
My goal is to upperdeck the house I'm at, because it's some girl I don't know's birthday. Welcome to adulthood, bitch.
My meds have diminished my sex drive, this must be what regular women feel like
Oh yes. Made out with a grandmother..... she had fake boobs and it was 330am. That makes it okay.
Mardi gras at its finest.
We went to the casino to try to earn enough money to go to new Orleans comfortably. I'm already drunk. This is a horribly immoral start to summer.
May or may not have just lost a contact hanging out Anthony's sunroof. Drunk. Hint: I can only see out of one eye right now.
Somehow it went from suicide to pierced nipples. I think we're good.
We met up and made out in front of an empanada spot, if that's not romance then idk what is.
drunk snapchatting is the worst, because i woke up with great pictures of my tits saved to my memories and no idea who i sent them to
You need to get out of there before he falls in love with you.
I just remembered that I insisted everyone watch porn together last night.
You might see me up a tree with a deranged look in my eye , just walk away at that point
Randomize
