Wine + wine + wine + wine + bud light = puke.
MCAT status: Day 64, no longer can remember what sex is like.
In an m&m suit playing manhunt drunk. And you thought you werent guna have a good time
I hope we all get so wasted that we ride the cows again
I had to explain to my dentist that my tooth was chipped because we designated my mouth as the official way to open beer. I feel like our level of partying is no longer socially acceptable.
Parents said they were cutting off my AmEx card. So I immediately went up to the liquor store and purchased $550 of booze before it was canceled. I'm expecting your arrival in 30 minutes.
I managed to get through my meeting without throwing up in someone else's office, so there's that for an accomplishment today.
What good is being a girl if you can't terrorize boys with pregnancy scares??
Let's be honest, I'm cooking chicken nuggets in my Helm jersey and underwear who has their life more together than me?
It's a sexual break up. We maintain a friendship and leave any and all sexual attraction out. It's not hard, having a baby is harder than that.
It was like the icing on a beautiful fuck boy cake.
Roomies told me I showed up to my house alone with no pants on and burrs in my hair... I live in the middle of the city
Sarah just give sum homeless dude a lap dance, took like 2$ worth of change from his cup and was all like, "Biiitch, this aint free"..
not being a booty call is very strange. Who knew there was so much time for activities at night!
i just turned on my printer and found 10 pounds of german chocolate inside. i think i found where you hid your candy last night
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