if you dont talk to me in person you cant text me
Where are you???
With some dude on the way to his house to blaze
You went back to a stranger's house????
He isn't a stranger...he used to be on kids, inc.
I love LA.
so I woke up and found tortilla in my belly button
still doesn't change the fact you were dunking your sock in the toilet.
I woke up and he had cut my bangs and put makeup on me.
I don't care how good they make you look, you've got to stop sleeping with gay guys.
i shall enjoy my approximately 2 hours of being sober today
When the tupperware hit the highway it was like a vomit bomb
Apparently she came home completely covered in mud, pretending to be a bird...and she still had more sex than any of us this weekend.
It was fun, but I mean, any day that starts with shower tequila is bound to be good.
So I hear you're taking over showing your penis responsibilities now that I'm gone?
after further investigation i found out he's a little bit married..
Went to bed with a bowl of spaghetti O's on my chest, I make my own breakfast in bed. New level of laziness
Happy Halloween!! Last Halloween we spent together you got brought home in a shopping cart
I am naked and annoyed.
So this morning when I woke up. I found my refrigerator open and no more food. It was empty, I'm home alone for the week. Where in hell did that food go?
Randomize
