Did you go home with that guy without me?
Sorry boo - it's pouring and I found a boy with a car
we got a new version of the plan b at the pharmacy now. its called next choice. you would think they would come up with better names for these things.
He left an unopened 12 pack of beer by my bed. I guess that's his way of saying thanks for the sex..
My girlfriend was pissed, so if I had to guess, i'd say I had a GREAT time last night
it's like a replay of two fridays ago...except not in a motel and i'm not having sex in the shower.
I hope your sleeping good cuz when u wake up im punching you square in the face
no dude I'm not doing anything bad to her...remember she's always the DD she has blackmail material on literally all of us
Imma do me. And by that, I mean I'm going to walk across campus still drunk at 9am on a Tuesday.
lets talk about you, dubstep, and a bunny suit.
today i was walking through gramercy with a dress bag from David's Bridal and a bag of McDonald's. No guy would make eye contact with me as I scarfed down my fries. I think I was mankind's walking night terror.
Emoji's do wonders when you actually have nothing at all to say..
the fact that you have a guy named the "i want you to tie me up and fuck me" guy speaks volumes about your life.
I just remembered something. We made out last night, people cheered.
everytime he speaks i want to fuck him less. i just wanna tell him to shut up and take his pants off and we could both be happy.
My sister gave me satin sheets. We can fuck on satin sheets.
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