well that was a long night...
dude, you were pretty messed up... what happened?
no idea... but i still woke up with my pirate hat on
Why is it that you only get to have sex when you haven't shaved your legs in six weeks and are wearing period stained granny panties?
Just watched porn on a 60 inch plasma screen TV... So that's where the clitoris is
He's been dancing to the same Rob Thomas album in his room for almost 8 hours now. Please never, ever bring extacy over here again.
And then somehow we were arguing over how to fold our arms
Cognac is not meant to be taken in shots. I just wanted you to know the desperation of last night.
It's only been a week and i've already broken my no summer randoms rule twice.
Lmao. We just snorted some mystery powder uriah found packged up in my car, that i know has been in there almost a year... Its adventure time.
Thank God I didn't lose my virginity to that asshole. That woulda been like winnin a raffle ticket for a free bag of dog shit. But with like a really pretty bag. A pretty bag full of dog shit.
he peed on his own floor last night after we left the bar. pretty much sums up how i feel about the evening
thats because you have standards... and i have a thing for guys that give me free drugs.
Chipotle. Because when you've had diarrhea for 6 days why not just make it 7
I think that all guys are assholes, some of them just have less assholeish qualities that we accept in our lives and that we can look past enough to deal. They have to be a pretty special asshole.
You did a body shot out of her belly button with a bendy straw.
I just spent 3 hours in the back of an unmarked police cruiser. Best. Date. Ever.
Randomize
