I don't know what you were told but i for sure didn't sleep with any one but steve's couch.
there's a taquito in the driveway. If it's not yours I'm going to eat it.
I think I just met the technical qualifications for binge drinking in five minutes
his genitalia just looks like a thumbs up. a really really small thumbs up.
It was like some kind of slut recycling operation. She gave me the shirt of the last guy she slept with in exchabge for mine so I didn't have to wear the same thing to work. She's been doing it for years
what the fuck a piece of candy corn just came out of her nose
you just knocked on the window of the ambulance and waved at me as we drove away
did you dip my ponytail in franzia? its the only thing i can think of to explain my hair right now.
Where are you? I hear fireworks and you've gone missing. I'm sure that is not coincidence.
I am pretty damn sure that neither my body or his body is ready for how drunk I am getting tonight
The next time you try to drunkenly strip me in public let's make sure it's not anywhere near the daiquiri factory or a group of police officers.
I desperately wanted to wear your shirt.
He didn't even realize I was drunk. He probably just thought I loved Torchwood so much that I no longer knew how to use my thumbs
I might run out into oncoming traffic. Id rather break my legs and/or die then continue with today.
He just said "I can't wait to penetrate you tomorrow" I sat in silence for a second...he attempted to save it by saying "I can't wait to enter you".
In the last 2 hours I managed to have romantic starlit sex on the beach as the tide came in with not only just a gorgeous man, but one who happens to be Eastern European and finishing Harvard law school.
Oh wow. I want to be you right now.
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