actually, I'm a sock model
Contrary to popular belief, while 19 is an attractive age, it does not equate to sexual prowess.
hooking up with chicks might be the way to go after all. walk of shame looks better in her clothes.
She made me put my jeans under her mattress so that I wouldn't leave in the morning while she was still sleeping. Apparently I just look like "that guy".
It's 3 am and my parents just came up the driveway in a limo. They didn't leave in a limo. I'm scared to even ask.
Thanks for having 911 ready when I jumped off the balcony
I'm so prepared to puke on walk of shame tomorrow that I'm putting a toothbrush and toothpaste in my purse the night before. And to think, my dad thought I wouldn't make it in college.
He's hinting that I'm starting to be kicked out of their blunt rides, I can feel it.
And our DD is passed out in the bathtub with the curtain closed. What happened tonight
I'm basically a mama hen. I keep them warm and let them wonder around the house. not to mention, I keep eye on them just in case the falcons around the house try to snatch them away.
I don't even know what to say right now
btw telling the cab driver, that took you to your booty call that is now returning your wallet that you left in his cab, that you want to hug him is awkward
Ran into him again last night, stole his glowstick and walked away. The glowstick mountain in my room keeps growing.
Go to hungover. Go directly to hungover. Do not pass go. Do not collect 200 dollars
Sent nudes to my best friend's boyfriend and mom last night. So I'm coping with that on top of my hangover this morning
Dad's teaching me to make moonshine this weekend as "college prep". How scared should I be sis?
Randomize
