I like bacon cheeseburgers and the pussycat dolls
Does that mean you want me to loosen up your buttons at carls jr?
The Shake Weight not only toned my arms but significantly improved my hand job form and efficiency.
I still can't figure out why that's not in the commercial.
Today in psych we learned that you are a whore.
Me specifically?
Yep.
she peed on how many people?
you blew your rape whistle in his face every time he got near a girl till he left the party...
"too many" and "free shots" never belong in the same sentence
he said he needs a little more pabst, some time to jack off and a sandwich and he'll be ready
He said bring my breathalyzer and Anna's pepper spray, I didn't ask questions
I think once you know a guy's chest measurements the stalking has gone too far..
I'm drunk doing an ab workout. I can only hope I make it to bed tonight.
After last night I am convinced that you are the human embodiment of alcoholism and bad decisions.
Beer and Reeses. dinner of champions
Don't forget my pants whenever you come over, otherwise we can't get in.
I’m literally watching say yes to the dress, eating fancy cheeses with crackers, and I have orange dark chocolates. All of which is being washed down with merlot. And I’m 100% sure a porno is gonna go down next door tonight. They don’t have a car and arrived via taxi. Happy holidays from motel 6 Pendleton Oregon!
So, I just ordered a breathalyzer for this weekend. I figured if I'm getting shitfaced, I should at least be scientific about it.
Randomize
