so i wake up and the chick who i had sex last night left her phone number. next to the number was a broken condom. should i call?
is it bad that listening to the rabbi's wife talk about how we should only be with one person is making me really, really horny for no string attached sex
We didn't need to cut her off. I'm pretty sure the lit candle she almost drank would have done it for us
she called for a booty call so i sent mike as my stunt double
I'm gunna send you baby bottles of vodka for those nights when you just give up
She offered to treat me to breakfast after a one night stand if I meet her parents and sex again if I act as her bf. It may be a trap but its a offer I won't refuse.
Although I'm glad you didn't let my climb in the sink, I really wish you would have let me pretend to be a duck in the shower for a little longer
But if I live with you I'll help pay rent. Only if you promise no 50 shades of what the fuck internet hookups
Is it possible to be sexually attracted to someone's hair?
all I know is id definitely throw up if you guys ever dated so if you do stay the fuck away from me
All I want is a hot dog on a Saturday at 2:19 is that to much to ask?!
Okay everything with a penis is officially dead in my eyes
He doesn't understand the concept of a strip club. He keeps falling in love
So I FINALLY get to start out a story, "So there I was, naked except for a toboggan hat and handcuffs..."
I'm seriously scared right now. Woke up next to 3 geese and a lot of feathers ..
Randomize
