No, we're smoking outside. We're hot boxing the world.
driving around with you guys listening to the beach boys made me very concious of how white you all are.
what customs doesn't know wont hurt them
This was baby jesus's way of getting you to wait until the next bikini wax
We had to leave. Dave knocked a dude out for saying yolo.
I love it. Like, more than my penis at the moment.
i threw up in his garden in front of like five people smoking a joint. they let me have a hit after i was done so it was okay
The internet is out at West Chester so I'm masturbating using my imagination. What is this, the fucking dark ages?
Tbh I fell asleep cuddling a bag of Brazilian nuts. Franzia never dissappoints me
did you just describe your masturbation session as "rad af??"
Rough day
Good thing I've started drinking again
MUFFINS DON'T MAKE YOU ORGASM MULTIPLE TIMES OR HAVE ROCK HARD MUSCLES.
Autocorrect changes "sex" to "sec". I have been so long without it my phone thinks I made a mistake.
just made a presentation to 40 students and my professor about morals and ethical issues..still drunk. at 8am. I wish I could remember how it went.
Do you ever just want to be mashed potatoes?
Randomize
