I pooped in a mop bucket.
WTF???
Their employee restroom was locked what kind of customer service is that
soo apparently i was out of money so i stayed in the bathroom for an hour-ish passing out paper towels for money..needless to say i got kicked out
I'm sorry but all I really read was "my nipples will get hard."
i was so worried that when his hands were down my pants he was going to find the weed i stole from him
He's the kind of drunk guy that would pee in your mouth while you give him head.
Luke did at least 8 shots of pure mayonnaise last night. I am not sure if that is better or worse than my 2 cement mixers?
True but, who really needs money in europe? Just barter with sexual favors. A bowl of cereal is worth a blowjob.
Can I please come dance in my bra to destiny's child with you? I'll bring the wine and the glitter
Other than my penis smelling like an ashtray, it went really well.
Just followed a blind kid around for 20 minutes to see how awesome his guide dog was. And he was pretty fucking awesome
He said he didn't want to go down on me so I told him we were going to have an oral stalemate.
he offered me cocaine within 5 minutes of my arrival. yes of course i'm keeping him
So our night ended with 6 cruisers, a fire truck, and an ambulance. Also, lots of blood. How was yours?
my mom just came into my room and handed me a news paper article about women on the verge of a drinking problem... i can already tell its not about to be sunday funday
I'm not gonna lie. I need sex like plants need water right now. I just need the dick.
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