and the officer said have you been drinking
and i said NOO SIR.
and he said, I am a woman.
i left the bar a little after you and ended up flipping my car in the arbys drive thru
I think a girl in front of me glued an ugg tag to a weird pair of boots.
You can't just say things like "great depression theme party" and then not respond.
surprisingly enough, it isn't that uncomfortable to have sex with a heart monitor on
all i remeber is falling off a fence and banging him in the middle of the street, not sure which one gave me this cut
Everytime I walk into a bathroom at school that I've taken a pregnancy test in I get a little bit nostalgic....
we flagged you as soon as you tried to put the lime in the microwave to prove it was really a kiwi. again.
Side note, we are 25 fighting over our sophmore year RAs Drunk facebook attention
Note to self. Don't order a $10 bottle of wine on a 40 min flight because it seems like a good deal.
God you're perfect.
I am. So drunk right now. Good work, Frontier.
Well for better or worse the home brew is almost done, want to get drunk/loose your sight tonight?
You know you are 86'd from the legacy right? You can't down shots then spike the shot glass
You were sitting in a chair and you said "I just feel like a little fishy, floooooating through the ocean, so pretty"
How much of a thot would I be if I put this pic up? On a scale of thot-ish to Queen of Thotlandia
It's starting to get sad how I have this 'new beginning' feeling after every negative pregnancy test
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