You kept telling that ginger girl, "it's not your fault, it's not your fault, it's not your fault."
She played chubby bunny with our cocks.. She got 4
And the best part is that she's coming home to find that I completely shaved her dog.
Apparently I walked up to him, mumbled something incoherently, then started to make out with him. Why does this always happen.
You get home ok?
Uh, you stopped by my house at 4 am and woke me up, so yeah.
i want to have awesome sex and feel fuzzy.
think I signed up for a 5k last night while blackout.
The only thing that got rode last night was the shit face train. I brought him home to see wht all the hype was about and he just started crying and puking in my bathroom.
Hypothetically speaking, when I get a sugar glider would it be frowned upon to bring it Ito classes with me in m pocket?
Considering who their parents are, maybe you should use vodka for the baptism.
what do you mean i can't make cookies with a blow dryer? challenge accepted.
I used to sleep with a guy on the USA rugby team... He stole my credit card and my Hitman DVD. I'm more upset about the Hitman DVD..
rest in peace liver.
It was nice having you occupy space in my body that could be holding beer n chicken.
that's going in my livers obituary.
I was totally going to fuck him and then his friend walked in brushing his teeth, whipped down his pants and started doing the windmill. Ultimate cock block
Thanks for not letting me get involved with a serial killer. That's true friendship
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