My wife all of the sudden got markedly better at giving blow jobs. Should I be happy or concerned?
her fupa was seducing me. this is the last time i'm doing shrooms.
Just got Netflix. Dexter Marathon. Still in my PJ's. Only eaten cookie dough and drinking a 40. I have never reeked so strongly of lonely .
I need someone to meet me at the end of the road and throw captain morgan at my face like they do with water at marathons
There was a staple in my grits at waffle house last night. My knees are bruised as hell. And I puked pink all over my bathroom. Gooood night.
I'm drunk at a gay bar with my riding crop. God save the queens
Can't a woman sleep on the floor in her own apartment in peace without being judged?
Oh god. I asked to "play his sexaphone" which I though was a super sex way to say "let me blow you". He fucking walked home at 4:30am
I was orgasming and dying of laughter at the same time. I think I've found the One.
Ended up in some house where this dude has a $1200 leopard cat
my grandpa paid for my boob job but he just doesn't know it.
Then while I was crying on his shoulder, he got a boner. Soo. I kinda just hopped on.
Hey, it's Valentine's Day weekend and were single and off our periods. Let's live like queens.
you would not believe who i just fucked on my lunch break
Are we at that level of friendship where we can share slutty stories and not hold it against the other person at a later date ?
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