After last night, I could never be a politician.
I think I'm going to go home and read The Bible.
so tomorrow. i'm thinking coinstar then adderall?
Spotted at kelly concert- 10 year old in a homemade "I do not hook up" t shirt. Well I should certainly hope not, sweetheart.
I just found a bagel and a condom in my coat pocket. I love blackouts
hey girl hope you're alright, you hit that tree really hard. have a good night.
do you remember waking up from your blackout, kissing me ever so softly on the stomach, and saying "i love you bro. so much," then passing back out?
I'm hard boiling eggs, drinking rum, and talking to my 8 year old brother about the 10's times tables. This is what thursday is all about.
Ugh I miss culture and lesbians already
Watching frozen planet. There's a beach master sea lion with about 50 sea lion bitches fighting another sea lion for said bitches. It's a bloody battle. Dude. You have over 50. Share.
It was like the devil him self busted his red hot satanic nuts all over my face and burned my eyes out of my innocent sockets.
My homemade mace ate through its aluminum container. I make awesome mace.
I am just glad I was home to catch most of it, cause it smells BAD.
I'm not a scientist but that could be because it's homemade mace. That is however just a hypothesis
Sarah is throwing up still and I'm eating salad with my fingers
Fuck that guy and his dumb haircut and awesome dick
I got so drunk I thought my tennis court was a corn field so I laid in it and ate pizza
Randomize
