Kareoke will never be a sober sport
Everything went well, until I walked into his bedroom and there was a Ronald Reagan poster watching over his bed - creepy
tonight, alcohol would be proud of us
can we meet up so i can piece together the end of my night? for instance, did i jump or fall into a plant?
I haven't seen any of my friends sober in months. We have classes together.
yes you're required to wear a bikini its the snowpocalypse beach party
I knew I was rolling hard when I realized I had been rubbing the couch for an hour
If i had 4 hands right now is have booze in 3 of them and my cock in the other all because you went to denver. just sayin.
I am an advanced cybernetic robot sent back in time to 2013 to fuck my wife senseless for hours on end. Have you seen this wife?
Eddy, if you don't want to roll play then say so. This is just obnoxious
Does Jesus have blonde highlights? Pretty sure I saw him in a lavender shirt and Sperry's.
He came to my Harry Potter marathon wearing a Hogwarts uniform. Of course I fucked him.
She referred to my balls as rotund and handsome
My mom just said "okay girls, the ONLY thing i ask is that you stay sober Saturday afternoon, until halfway through lunch. And you don't wear that crystal camo hat. This is a funeral, not a tailgate party"
Best wishes.
Hey! you should come over!
Who is this? The number is saved as "Sexy Awesome"
On a scale from 1 to 10 how gross is it to get a chili dog from a vending machine?
Randomize
