trsut me youll find me, im the only kanye west here and every1 is chanting dbag at me
Like reprimanding the wall for "sneaking up on me" drunk
I mean, once you help another girl drunker than you zip her jeans you can't help but be friends after that
Dear America, sometimes I miss your Everclear and its consequences.
At one point I thought we were going to have to fuck our way out of their apartment
Whoever owns the butter that i always steal out of the office fridge definitely put THC butter in there this time. Shit just got real.
I just want a teacup pet pig so I can take him to parties with me and never have to walk home alone again.
There's no discreet way to sneak a cucumber into the shower lol
Just don't let me get too drunk. At one point I pulled out my dick and pissed at that party. Like on the wall.
I'm trying to be sexual and you're sending me smashmouth lyrics
It was like the icing on a beautiful fuck boy cake.
I'm setting goals and achieving them. I'd say I'm quite mature for my age.
You're goal was to fuck him and you don't even remember it.
He knocked me over backwards in my chair. I had a beer in each hand. Didn't spill a drop.
She started crying, nearly punched a guy, started smoking multiple cigarets backwards and broke the slide on her bong. Why do I always end up babysitting the crazy ones?
The air tonight was full of shame when we saw each other.
Well if u wouldn't have had sex on the front porch last night I think that could have been avoided.
Randomize
