I just saw the girl you left with - Chris Hansen's looking for you
Yeah. He most definitely jizzed himself in the face.
Thats how high i was. The fact that he looked like Seth Rogan was apparently a good thing.
I just threw up a christmastime peep. I am literally already sick of the holidays.
so he came in me this morning and i was like WTF DUDE. i called him Daddy until he agreed to pay the full $40 for plan B. He wants to name our Patrick because it will be a st pattys day baby. absolutely NOT.
This whole foot fetish thing is getting out of control. He would rather hold my feet than me after we fuck.
I mean besides the fact someone got stabbed, I still had a pretty good night.
You walked away saying that you had to pee and you never came back. We found you an hour later in his roommate's bed. Under the covers. Still in your wet bathing suit.
Wat day did I have sex in my sleep? I just made a Dr appt for Friday and I want to talk to her about it
It was like in the Christmas carol when the guy pulls his robe back and 2 small children appear... except this time it was a massive scrotum
I forgot what I was gonna say, but I'm pretty excited to not be pregnant.
Omg my brain. Most recent thought: I fucking prayed in the bathroom that the other girl would leave. Prayed to Jesus
I just had to explain to my grandma what a reach-around is. Too far..
Like I’ve seen him completely trashed and I’ve also seen him rip shirtsleeves off with his teeth and I can’t tell if I’m intrigued or not
Sitting naked, eating lucky charms with rain boots on
Randomize
