My Yahoo Answers account was suspended. Apparently I answered "I like chicks who do anal" to over 100 questions last night.
can't come out tonight. went to the bar again last night and the bartender hugged and thanked me so much for my "generosity." I'm intrigued but terrified to see my credit card bill.
I woke up with the wrong plaid-shirted guy in my bed.
Woke up this morning 8 levels higher in Call of Duty then when I started drinking... told you I was better when I was drunk.
I definitely didn't wake up this morning thinking "i wanna get gang banged today"
I hid my booze in my old Sesame Street lunch box. Big Bird might be disappointed, but I feel Oscar the Grouch would approve.
I don't want to talk about her cat for two hours only to dry hump till I'm blistered. Not worth it.
I experienced pure joy just moments ago when I looked down and saw that I had another pop tart to consume down my mouth hole.
I would fuck him In a heartbeat, an obese child running up stairs with an irregular heartbeat, heartbeat.
If my sophomore year were to be made into a novel, it would be titled "dances with salvia"
Se wrote an essay in class about proper and fashionable winter wear for dogs. Of course I regret fucking her.
When I came out of the bathroom you were naked dead asleep on the couch but your dick was still rock hard standing straight up. I almost took a pic. It was impressive.
color coded lube a great way to organize my bootie calls
My father has a definite type: blonde, busty, 18-22. It was awkward when I was in college, but now I'm over it. I play wingman for him and he buys me expensive purses for the assistance in getting him hooked up with girls younger than me. Win-win.
Add tweezing eyebrows to the list of things not to do while on adderol....
Randomize
