hey its robert, we just made out in the backyeard. i'm inside now and you should come to the bathroom and meet me.
That's why they call him "the cheesegrater".
I'll start choreographing the sperm rain dance now
I can promise you that this new years eve will rival the one from senior year when we got that exchange student deported.
I like to balance the number of cups of coffee to bong rips in the morning before work.
I am pretty damn sure that neither my body or his body is ready for how drunk I am getting tonight
The cops walked in and cracked up bec he was passed out on the couch in a pink tutu.
Just wait til you visit, there will be an endless supply of fresh dick for your demand #economics
Ugh I hate you, and the responsible adult life I pretend to have during daylight hours
These kids are nice. Shrooms make everything so nice.
I woke up in confetti... confetti and shame
We're ordering chinese food so if you want to get on this obesity train answer me now.
She wants to have a threesome with Taylor Swift. I think this is the kind of love my grandparents spoke of.
You don't get to call me bro after you've had your dick in me.
we didn't even throw knives this time! it was just the carrot peeler
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