Viking lives by an ancient code of honor that we do not understand.
What code could that possibly be? Bothering the fucking shit out of people while being physically repulsive?
What should our trivia night team be named?
Define Statutory
let's bang
You're in my phone as 'Weird Bus Guy' so I think my answer's no.
I overheard a kid saying to his mom at Walmart: "Mommy.. should we buy cups for daddy's spit?"
Just had a girl agree to give me a blowjob in exchange for wearing my jacket during class. Talk about successful negotiations. Best day of my life
Last night I dreamed I was having gay sex in prison. That's the last time we go to theme night at the club.
the choice between paying your electricity bill and getting herpes medicine is a tough one.
I fucked her and then she made me sleep on the floor next to her bed because she 'has a committment problem'
The last time you said "no one will know" is when you ran out of sprite at your birthday party and dumped a handle of straight up vodka into the jungle juice.
Trying to figure out which chair my head was under last night
Tell him to dress up like Shaggy and kidnap him then bring him to me. We can pretend. Imaagination.
Oh jesus...leave it to you to hit on not one but two guys who can't fuck you till marriage.
It's been 12 hours since I have heard from you and social media has given me no indication you are anything but dead, so that's what I'm going with.
STOP SENDING ME NAKED PICTURES WHEN I'M TRYING TO TEACH. MONDAY TUESDAY 1-3 IS A DICK AND ARSE FREE ZONE
Is it totally acceptable to fuck a co-worker even though we don't speak the same language?
Why do you even have to ask me that question
Randomize
