:O -> O: ... that's emoticon for "he threw up in my mouth while we were making out"
We decided to have a girls night of four lokos, three of us cried and the other puked
Just threw up in my seat during the national anthem. Probably not good.
Please tell me you're throwing the cats into this foot of snow.
Whatever. It was high school. Back then I'd blow anyone who had enough room between their chest and their steering wheel for my head to fit.
I need a pic of your cock for our cock collage
I legit just woke up on my couch, snuggled up next to some guy who's wearing my roommate's pink bathroble. What the fuck do they put in those shots?
I ended up passing out on the shitter for like an hour with mcds smoothie all over my face
Setting up an obstacle course with ladders, hurdles, and a spring board to the pool. you down for drunk races through it later?
Can you get the drug form of snow for the blizzard this weekend?
I'm either a high functioning alcoholic or I'm making the most of the fact that this is the last year that its socially acceptable to be black-out drunk five days a week.
Also I'd apologize for texting you flipping my shit about the science of hair growth while I was shrooming last night but we know each other better than that
Lost my anal v card with Peter Thiel's RNC speech on in the background. Unbelievably appropriate
Seriously where are the good guys?
The friend zone.
You whispered 'For Frodo', handed me your shirt, and charged campus security.
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