I think scott just propositioned me for sex
My bracket is officially just a list of teams that lost.
i was concerned for your health after you took your "last shot" four times...
he's drinking at 8 in the morning. it's going to be one of those "or else the terrorists have won" kinda days
I drove to Chevron at noon and the Hatian lady goes "Oh, nothing to drink yet white boy?"
How's work?
Spinning.
We have a drunken confused pantless man in our apt. Boots.
We made out for three hours. Then she said she didn't sleep with redheads and left the party. So yes, I'm still drinking.
If a man doesnt have the ability to fuck you well on a small climbing wall, I don't think he deserves you.
You dont lie about slip and slides
Pretty sure I'm about to get another tattoo. It'll have mom in there somewhere for Mother's Day.
So because I'm off tomorrow that means your dick could be in my mouth majority of that time
I'm out of breath and my thighs burn but at least it's over.
A log hopped out of the fireplace and caught the carpet on fire. Good summary of this election if you ask me.
Fursuit judi Dench just stared directly at me for 3 solid minutes telling me that cats arent dogs and i believe her because if i dont cat jason derulo might try to have sex with me
Randomize
