Who goes to Church hungover
Those who weren't lucky enough to go still drunk
I wonder how skeet ulrich feels about the skeet skeet phrase and and what it denotes.
quadriplegic porn is always funny
no. no its not
Talk about awkward... Just went to dinner with my mother and realized I fucked our waiter the night before. She HAD to see the looks he was giving me!
he said he "kind of had sex before.. Barely" i think it was one of those situations where you slide into home and get tagged out.
you were drinking a pitcher of what you called "16 loko" and making everybody guess what the secret ingredient was
Told him I'd blow him in the bathroom. There was a giant window everyone was looking thru. He whipped it out n I burst out laughing n walked away. Even blackout drunk I set the bar high. You should be proud.
No more co-pays for contraceptives. Whoever says Obama is a bad guy has clearly never had a pregnancy scare.
I asked her politely not to touch my dick
LISTEN TO ME! GAY. FIREFIGHTER. They are the most rare and precious kind of gay. The kind little gays dream of. It needs to happen.
Well at least I will forever be known as the girl he ate out on the lifeguard stand while people walked by. On the first date.
LMAO I like how "don't worry I'll bring chasers" is your way of assuring things will be ok
Sorry for trying to baptize you last night
You knew the entire thing in Latin I was so impressed
It's a sad day when a deadly hurricane headed your way is less depressing than your relationship status.
you walked into the party, and all you had on was your left sock... literally.
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