Taljing aboutpenisrs w gerruly ska pops
too bad being hungover isnt a job. just threw up from 9am to 5pm
were trying to schedule when i can give him head in between classes.
he proceeded to grab my vagina through my leggings in the middle of the dance floor. strangely enough I was okay with it
He just broke up w his most recent gf again, wish I could message her and be like it's not you he's gay.
I need to find a more grown up way of dealin with a hangover at the office than pringles and mountain dew at 8:30 am...
She just pored wine down the turkeys hole and said that she christened it like the whore that it is...happy thanksgiving.
Random thought: what if being devoured by animals was a death penalty option...and you got to choose the animal?
I woke up with his condom in my mouth. I actually use them now you should be proud of me.
You slapped my ass and yelled "HOOTY TOOTY WHAT A BOOTY" in a Schwarzenegger voice
You pretty much lost your mind. Your ego has gotten ten time the size of your balls.
Googled 'how drunk am I' and it was NOT helpful
ill give you some hints: blood, carnival, fog machine, happy meal.
I imagine you as a cat holding your burrito with two paws and cutely eating it
Three cheers for handling my crush on my boss in an entirely reasonable manner, by having a threesome with my coworkers.
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