Her vagina should come with caution tape.
Our professor just said "No class today, go get stoned." A guy seriously walked over and hugged him.
For those pictures, I will suffer this headache.
He kissed my cheek and I could smell it the whole way home like shit
"I never want to have to say, 'Please don't squirt me with your breast milk' again.
I don't have the urge to be a home-wrecker with these two. I think I've grown, don't you?
Was just told that I was slipped 2 hits of acid in my in flight drink before takeoff. 8 hours to Germany wish me luck
the whole "pretend to be sober/pull it together for my family" thing really blew up in my face when i threw up into my pillowcase.
After he finished he proceeded to check my boobs for breast cancer.
We got Pizza Hut & Papa Johns, delivered within seconds of each other, and both delivery people did a shot. I was put on Earth for this moment.
I have a rash on my arm from the cat litter. Think the cat will be mad that I peed in its box?
Wtf. So apparently this 5 star establishment doesn't allow strip putt putt in the parking lot. We all just got kicked out of our rooms.
We are the rockettes of vaginal bleeding
Sometimes, being an adult means buying a bottle of whiskey after work and live tweeting the commercial breaks on food network.
got some info she was last seen with some guy wearing goggles
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