So you walked 4 miles to get home but stopped by the store first to get a vegetable tray? How drunk were you?
It went from "haha, this will be funny" to "full blown anime porn fetish"
SANTA'S REAL. I GOT MY PERIOD.
I was more concerned about the amount of mcdonalds fries on the floor around me than i was with my lack of clothes.
And he was super vague about his life, it was frustrating. I totally boned a homeless guy, didn't I?
I was gonna tell her, but there were too many tongues in my mouth
well after pounding on the ceiling for 5 mins i just went up there to tell them to shut up.. 2 hours later i'm naked, high, lying on their kitchen floor. it escalated so quickly
What is this nonsense on the table
Your idea.
I mean the hole taco that was chewed up and spit out
You ruined me. I can't stop referring to everything outside as the "no-walls" ever since you showed me that video while I was tripping balls. My speech may be permanently altered for the rest of earth spins
Your "dubstep at ceilis" resulted in a random naked guy busting into my room and peeing all over my bathroom
Please don't make me ever have to hear the words "the Queen's gynecologist" ever again.
Dude. That Grinch had his priorities right when he was worried that there might be a cash bar at that town celebration.
i'm extremely hungover on the ski bus and the driver is playing abba. this. is. not. okay.
By the end of our first date my penis was pierced.
She was blowing air into green onions and tying knots in them to make "balloons"
Randomize
