walking on gravel proved too much for her barefeet so she traded her bra for some guys sneakers.
Tell your boobs to stop staring at me.
tagging him in all 73 close-ups of your cleavage might have been a little obvious.
Her exstacy made her nickname everyone David. Nobody knows who the fuck she's talking to so we just say no to everything she says. She's crying.
Doctorate. Vaginahole. Cinnamon. Rainbow. Fill in the blanks in the morning.
She said "oh yeah" like Hulk Hogan with the muscle flex and everything. Totally digging this chick
I apparently made a "health and fitness" subcatagory called "drugs" on mint at some point. I used it to catagorize all of my nyc atm withdrawls for $60 haha
god, I have more takeout restaurants in my contacts than friends
What's an appropriate outfit for wearing to hangout with a girl you've talked to once, and had a 4way with?
I think "we've never met sober" is a great relationship to have with someone
A dick pic is not a proper way to say I'm sorry
I have booze and I wanna give you a bj. How can you be mad at me?
So hypothetically speaking.. say someone dropped their birth control pill in a hot bowl of soup, and it possibly disintegrated.. would it be just as useful?
he tried to have the "are we in a relationship" chat last night. I stuck my fingers in my ears, yelled lalalalalala very loudly at him and told him I would stop having sex with him if he ever tried that conversation again. bad person, or just being a realist?
She's writing hockey erotica again.
Tell her to pick another team besides ours this time.
Randomize
