dude, you're never picky with who you hook up with, have a little dignity
nah man, chicks are like pokemon, gotta catch \'em all
is it just me, or are high schoolers getting sexier?
He adopted an old drug sniffing dog so that he won't lose his weed around the house anymore. It works.\n
you cant keep talent like that locked up in a relationship
I think the tooth fairy visited me last night... after I chipped my tooth n blacked out, I woke up to my purse filled with cocaine n sequins.
We are taking shots off of spoons and listening to Mary Poppins.
We are cuddling. She is so cute when she is too high to be a loud bitch.
It is. We should just be drunk all the time forever everything is like just 90% more perfect
did you know that my friend knows a guy with 3 balls what the actual fuck
I had sex with a Dutch boy on a rock last night. Happy graduation! x x
I feel like an elephant shit on me and left me to be miserable
he just fucked me for my cheese..
WE JUST PASSED A FUCKING SPACE SHIP! NOT JOKING! A REAL FUCKING SPACE SHIP! THIS IS NOT THE DRUGS! SPACE! SHIP!
so I'm walking to my last final while opening my giant red bull and i look over to my right and the guy beside me had one too and was looking back at me. without missing a beat he pulls out a bottle of jager, pours half in mine, half in his and goes "cheers"....i'm not even mad i probably failed my final
I'm hung over and my mom made me go to church. I feel like such a sinner.
I need an aspirin and some dignity.
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