How is it? Sketchville?
cheap drinks and peanuts cancel out any form of sketchiness
Angelique from Rock of Love is now doing phone sex commercials for central illinois....id say she's going places.
his tattoo said carpe diem which i thought was ironic considering his epilepsy
I refuse to have sex with you and your eBay condoms.
Just stop talking to douche bags. How do you manage to attract every asshole within a 100 mile radius?
If i could answer that i wouldn't be so afraid to move to a more populated area
Why did the fire extinguisher taste lemony?
If we don't rescue him from the fat chick soon, she is going to eat him alive and suck the marrow from his bones.
I went from naked with lasts nights hookup to Ihop in 6 minutes flat
I think that's a new house record
Oh my god did you actually lose a tooth
Do you think the police would frown on me opening a psych drug pharmacy on the side? Just to dispose of my drugs without polluting the water supply! It is for the animals!
Stop it. You know what r&b does to my body
If walking through the neighborhood with a bottle of tequila and margarita mix is postgrad life, I'm okay with it
you smell like vanilla and daddy issues
The Domino's delivery guy is in front of me at The Wendy's drive-through. Hmmm.....
I just don’t understand what sort of USPS worker wants to take my unitard and sex toys.
Randomize
