new midget porn idea. Wizard of Jizz: Munchkins Revenge
you're the one who masterbates every night to the titanic soundtrack
This is the kind of period I feel I should name out of respect to the fact I might have just gotten lucky this time.....
Hooking up with him would mean my type has officially become... drug dealer.
I think being an adult is being able to say no to free shots...I need to work on that.
there is a money trail leading from my bathroom to my living room.. the trail ends with a half eaten bag of chips with a note that says "magical chipz".. who am i?
We were on the ground in Tampa for 55 hours and we drank for 30 of them.
We won Spring Training 2013.
If I am telling you about the details of the shits I take I probably don't want to have sex with you. Probably.
Booty calls should never involve the cops.
Lol I think I might have been a little aggressive last night there is a blue ass print from your jeans on my wall
You're the only person I know that could get laid while visiting their grandpa in florida
We had sex in his hot tub. Then we saved a mouse that almost drown in his pool. We celebrated our heroism with more sex.
My drug dealer bought me a book for Christmas. What a gentleman.
Not my fault the fence refused to just break when I ran into it.
In what world does 'I'm awake' at 2:30 in the morning on a wednesday translate to 'let's fuck' in the span of one text? Where has the romance gone?
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