Good. You are like the clit whisperer.
if you don't go to jail tommorow I'll buy you a 40. Motivation.
It was scary, we all screamed. Never make mimosas in a car.
some gay kid said he wanted to blow him because "his eyebrows told a story"
I have bruises on the inside of my thighs from sliding down the stair case...thanks for encouraging that slut show
The number of times I've puked in the Walgreens bathroom is becoming way too many for my pride.
Love is....waiting for your girl to throw up her shot in the bathroom...then handing her her beer. Game face.
Besides the fact that the only male who has shown an interest in me in the last 5 months has a strange and unfortunate resemblance to fucking Frodo, I've been good thanks
Well I'm in the bathtub smoking a bowl and eating doritos and frosting so I might not be the one to advise you on this shit but I'll try.
There's no way you didn't at least start out with a dick. I obviously know there isn't one now, but there is no way that you were born a girl
There is someone out there for you right now. And we will find her. Or him. Her. Her, we'll start with tits.
Okay, so when I go to meet your grandma, let's do a quick cum check to we don't have another "what's that on your face?" situation.
Some girls wake up to good morning texts. I wake up to pictures of an angry Shrek getting a blowjob.
Also your Swedish friend who's name I don't remember is really good in bed.
*Norwegian
I cant miss out on a half day of work without a booty call
Randomize
