I'm sorry. Both for you two breaking up and because I just ate some of your cheez it's.
Also pencil in smooth jazz and illegal activities. The usual.
I'm going to knit you a pair of furry handcuffs. And you said that knitting class was dumb.
Hurry up. Some creepy guy with a "God is vengeful" flyer is asking where I wanna go most today. I think he's going to chop me into pieces.
Id have to say flaming beer pong was a royal success.
I'm moving out of my place and I just gave my mom a couch that I had sex on last night. Reduce, reuse, recycle at its best.
I had no idea he had such passive aggressive animalistic tendencies. This is the human equivalent of peeing on someone.
Also, being stuck with my family all week has made it very clear that I need to be drunk and I need to be fucked pronto
I'm going to have to include Angry Orchard in my thesis acknowledgements
You know the sex was good when he had to ask which way was north before he left.
I know you just got dumped by your gf but believe there is still good in the world. I just smoked a joint and took a fucking unbelievable poop. Give me a call tomorrow.
I love the smell of your bedroom. It smells of a mixture of cherries, leather, and unrequited homosexual desire.
I really wanna treat my body good. Because i plan on doing drugs
Think i may just have managed the saddest high-five in history. Finished a sudoku and high-fived myself, then looked around for somebody to high five. there was noone. forever alone.
i'm currently watching a guy eat a bunch of cacti and i have lost all faith in humanity
**cactuseses
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