Vanillla milkshakes are the new Gold Bond. Will explain later.
just saw someone puke all over a michigan fan. he didn't even flinch.
i literally would have sex with every single person on this girls wall, but not her
i have a $600 bill for my ER visit in which they did nothing but suggest to me that i am an alcoholic.
tolerance is too high. going on a liquor strike. ghandi style.
Your dignity remains intact. He, on the other hand, is completely convinced he slept with your cat.
He said he loved me so I pretended not to hear it because I don't think "I love your penis" was the response he was looking for.
Also, not pregnant! Way to go uterus! Good job on being a team player!
When I said 'i love my boyfriend' I didn't mean 'send me a picture of your penis'.
It's 11am on 4/20 and I'm already in urgent care.
She needs to go. She is like the Yoko Ono of our group.
Last night I dressed up as a cowgirl and walked into McDonald's. I bought 20 mcribs. There's pictures
We started off talking about nice cuddling and you turned it into fucking with a Santa hat on...
Have you considered sword swallowing? Something about that bj tells me you could make a it a career.
Ya it was crazy the power went just as she was about orgasm and the vibrator got fried with the power surge
Randomize
