I may just buy something cuz i have 6 weddings in the next year and a half.
Holy shittt I don't even have a bf
i can't believe i never thought of this: farticle man
We ran out of things to say while we were playing Never Have I Ever so we started playing I Have Done This... Have You?
I just beer bonged. Soco and spite please get on my levvl my hair is in buns
When did it become appropriate to call your mother the morning after? While still naked in bed? WHEN?!
No. I'm laying on the floor naked. I almost made it to the shower
This could be the definition of living by yourself
He was supposed to visit me tonight but he decided to stop in Tacoma so now I'm sitting on my bed naked eating oranges and candy corn while I watch Parks and Rec.
Now I have to hook up with him tomorrow DURING THE DAY.
Aside from the possibility of pregnancy, I'm going to call last night a raging success.
I asked him if we were going to get arrested for doing it in the bar parking lot. "Absolutly not" said the guy getting the blow job...
I'm setting goals and achieving them. I'd say I'm quite mature for my age.
You're goal was to fuck him and you don't even remember it.
I think part of my soul drowned in beer and/or jack daniels last night.
How was that girls surprise party last night?
Got absolutely destroyed tried to put somebody's leather jacket on and make out with their mother. You know.. the norm
It was funny for a while but 3 days later I still can't walk and I've constructed a diaper-like contraption to hold the ice pack on my vagina.
Im getting out of handcuffs then i'll give you a call
Oh the sweet dreamless sleep of drugs
You? On what? Why?
Randomize
