it's like there's an entire ecosystem in your vagina.
My ferret is drunk. Someone told me you'd know what to do?
everyone knows he gets back in a week and after that i'm not sleeping around anymore. it's like i have a expiration date.
So i was told that i peed in the sink, had sex with a pillow and banged on a washer while singing idian chants
As long as he sees me topless I don't care. Redemption. REEEDDDEMMMPPPTTIIIOOONNNNN
I'm just here to guide your spirit, avoiding herpes is on you though
I don't even know. I woke up in the bathtub with no shirt, covered in towels holding what appeared to be vanillia pudding mixed with captain morgan.
I woke up naked dangling by my feet from the balcony over his foyer. He's officially my new favorite booty call.
screw it, I'll just be a stripper until next August when then are looking for suitable teachers to teach the future of America. it's like a feel good movie just a little out of order and im a dude.
I'm concerned I'll look like a hooker on new years eve in this outfit
There are different standards on new years eve. To look like a hooker you literally need to be giving a guy head on the street while he's handing you cash.
Its not that hard, just find a girl reading 50 shades of grey and point her my way
remember how i yelled at you for inviting that coke dealer to the party?! i found the $100 bill they were snorting with in the couch.
..new slutty dresses or booze? i won't even waste time with the i told you so.
Soooo we should kick it sometime when it's like light outside. Drink outta cups.. Be bitches. 7, 6, 3, 5.. 4, 2, 1... Sschhkiddaellladiieessscchk
Finding my pants in the morning should not make me this proud
okay i know we havent talked for like weeks but i just really wanted to tell you that i miss your dick. like alot.
whose this? and thank you
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