Studying for the exam.. Identifying the portraits using phrases like "large penis"
Just took a final in the room where I lost my virginity. I think it was god luck.
The first song on his sex mix was "highway to the danger zone"
And then out of the blue she sent me a youtube video mashup of cats puking to techno music
We left the bar in 2 bicycle cabs. It cost thirty bucks and they took us to the wrong hotel. When we finally made it to the right one we ended up in a room with three randos from alaska. Jammed out with them for like an hour. Those inuits are good guitar players
Please never let me the drunk fat dancer in the bus girl
Your friends turned off our power in the basement and when we went to turn it back on I got sprayed in the face with a fire extinguisher. FYI.
I was dressed in monkey onesie serving people vodka jelly with a spoon...
Keep it up. It gets easier when you turn 21. Something happens in people's brains when they turn 21 and all of a sudden you have the power to drink constantly and abuse drugs and still graduate with good grades and your shit together. Im almost positive I read it in my freshman year bio textbook
I'm drinking and working out! I'm bench pressing the beer pong table and doing push ups and lifting the chair.
she was concerned about my dick piercings.
He just didn't want his drunk dick pulled out of his windbreaker at the family party
She has an alarming number of pictures with cat ears but the sex is amazing.
went to class still drunk this morning and my professor made the class give me a round of applause and said, "see people, THIS is inspirational... if she can make it to class in this condition there is no excuse not to show up!"
WHY are you masturbating to hockey fights?
Randomize