Have you learned any life lessons?
I like big butts and I cannot lie.
and I'm going to name my autobiography "blow jobs with enthusiasm are the best"
I'm naming my autobiography "Reasons Not to Date Girls From Texas."
this chick on a show just showed her boobs and let some guy paint them others asked why she did it and her reply i quote "i was bored" why dont chicks get bored more often
For sure. We should see if we can get Mike to pay for one, and have a triple kegger... :o==& (that's future me projectile vomiting. i try to be goal oriented)
He threw up in the campfire, the alcohol in his puke caught on fire. Im marrying this man
She was puking in a plastic bag while cleaning where she puked on the floor. She knows how to multitask.
I wanna die of smoke inhalation. In a huge teepee. Or one of those big things kids in kindergarten have that you throw up in the air then sit inside of.
Yeah, you're right, it's a conspiracy against you. This small tight knit group of people who don't like assholes.
it says 'tasty bitch' in sharpie on my tits...
He barged in the room with no shirt on, all fucking ripped with a half keg under one arm. Sara now calls him Bronan the Beerbarian
I feel like a drive thru vagina
Did I send you a drunk selfie with a pine tree last night?
You're right, I'd say my real all time low was when I let that fifteen-year-old feel my boob.
I think there is cocaine on my toothbrush.
I’ve basically been controlling him with my tits for months now, so I can’t even imagine what would happen if I start banging him
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